After wondering and wandering in the world a lot, I'm back to wondering on the page. In fact, back to doing both. I have been busy sharing what I know, see and do in the world. But not on here. It sort of slipped out of my radar in the learning  process that is called Starting A Business (SAB).

SAB is a wonderous, time-consuming, life-altering experience. As a confessed life-long learner, I got myself totally wrapped up in the whole process, and I'm pleased to say that it's magical, whilst also being frustrating, fun, educational and an emotional ride! SAB is also hard work, required dedication, and 'gumption' (this was the word used by myself and a couple of fellow SAB'ers in conversation the other night!). By gumption, I mean stick-at-it-ness. Stubborness. Graft. Toil. Devil-may-care-ness.


What's become wonderfully clear to me is that I am missing writing. And I'm also missing my friends from the past because SAB takes away much of the frittering time I used to spend having coffees and hanging out with folk. Don't get me wrong, I still do PLENTY of that, only now it seems that I am doing it with clients...and I'm loving it. But it does mean that there's a chunk of people that I'm missing out on being with and I'm starting to feel a tinge of guilt now and then at the odd text that says words to the effect of 'where are you?' / 'what are you up to now?'.

This is my compromise. Words on a page, a little snapshot of what's happening, and what I'm learning. With a promise of more to come. And of course a Birthday Picnic in June!

To bring you up to speed - here's a quick-ish summary of what I've been up to. I can do this much more easily today, because over the Easter holiday, I sat and went through my 'memory boxes' and have thrown out and whittled down to almost a box all the memorabilia collected by me since 1992....many things have been photographed, many have just been let go, and there's now a whole pile of theatre programmes ready to be framed and hung on the walls in the hallway stairwell....


I am now officially working for myself, wearing 3 main hats, all connected by mentoring, training and coaching, Forever living up to the "Helena the Trainer" label I earned about 20 years ago at TGI Friday's, i am now pleased to say that all that skill and effort has come together in a delicious way.

I am a Business Wealth Club Mentor in Croydon - I run twice monthly trainings for a wonderful community of committed business owners and entrepreneurs dedicated to growing their businesses through some high quality content and coaching. It's just about the very best thing I've ever done. To be able to support and grow people's skills, through sharing what I know is just magical. I could not wish for a better way to spend a Thursday. (www.thebusinesswealthclub.co.uk/croydon)

Out of this comes all the mentoring and coaching I'm doing with individual businesses, really helping them SHAPE their vision, teams and dreams into viable businesses that have tangible steps towards making those dreams come into reality and make a massive difference to so many more people. Love a little bit of 'ripple effect' and that's what this is all about. This is the exciting bit right now of this, I'm currently putting together the website for this one! More to come!

And the rest of the time, I'm carrying on that theme of making a difference through helping people write and deliver their brilliant ideas into workshops, webinars and programmes. (www.workshopsthatwork.co.uk).

I will say this for sure. SAB has definitely taken me to a whole new level of being. Whilst always having been a confident person, and an "I'll have a go at that" sort, through stepping up and into the new challenge of SAB, I have actually gained a level of appreciation for all that I've done in my past. Where before I would dismiss what I have learned along the way, I've come to know that EVERYTHING is important, and that EVERYTHING can be helpful to someone that does not know it! So that's my mission now. To share what I know, what I've learned, what I've experienced it, in the knowledge that someone somewhere is actually hugely hungry for that little nugget that I'm about to share with them.

Expect more of that here.

Sharing my WHY.

What is Your WHY?

At the Business Wealth Club (a business growth community that comes together twice a month to learn, connect and grow their businesses further)  one question that we raised was this: What is your WHY for being in Business?

It made me I realised I have not shared my WHY enough. 

My dream is simple:

I want brilliant people with brilliant ideas to share and express their brilliance through their chosen businesses and I want them to inspire others as they do so. I want to help driven business owners to grow and contribute to the welfare of the world and to create environments in which the people and the business thrives.

I want to help ANYONE with a great message and/or product to be easy to learn from and grow with.  My dream is born out of annoyance, irritation and frustration. 

Listening to everything and learning to act on it.

I love to learn. I value learning. I think it's the singular most important thing we can do as human beings. Learning evolves us. That's what I believe. As a great lover of new perspectives on old things or old perspectives on new-to-me-things, I put myself in the path of learning often and voraciously. I like to learn new things from new to me people, known things from new to me people, new things from known to me people...In short, I actually don't mind where my learning comes from, so long as it comes in a form that is palatable and honours me as an intelligent member of the audience.

Annoyance, irritation and frustration have a job.

What do you want to Inspire?

It's important to pay attention to the little feelings, grumbles and knawing irritations. They have their place these irritations, they are signposts. On my journeys of discovery and learning, I became aware that many brilliant people with many fantastic ideas are so ill-equipped to either run businesses that allow them the full stage to support the impact they COULD provide OR that they are so caught in their own message that they are not able to truly communicate it to their wider audience. As a result, they invite people to listen only to barrage, bully or bore them. That's not fair to themselves or others. It does not make for growth or learning.

The annoyance and frustration I experienced regularly has led me to now being  committed to helping people to get that brilliance out of YOUR heads and into shapes and structures that actually can increase your impact, influence and income as a result of being easy to listen to and act in line with. I want to help you communicate your vision and grow your business to it's full potential.

Give 'icky' emotions a little space and the dream will emerge.

My dream, founded on that frustration, came into being over the course of last year between July and November. I let it have it's time. I allowed myself to rage a little, rant a lot and then I allowed myself to build out of that.  As I sat with those feelings of irritation and frustration and gave them some space . I asked: 'how can I ease this?'  and the dream took hold.

Dreams need consistent attention and a little space...

I realised that I needed to shape the ideas into something that will continue to drive me as I set up a business around it and really allow myself to hold a space for people learning and growing through GREAT content and products, delivered well, that connects people and that contributes to the wellbeing of everyone it touches by creating communities that share and move forward together.  I've made a great start. I now run a Business Wealth Club in my local community (Croydon, England) and I also provide 'Structure for Stars'. Both businesses fulfil my ambition of inspiring entrepreneurs to really create sustainable, contributing businesses that support and grow themselves and the communities they are based in.

My dream is simple - if you have a great passion, if you have a great perspective, if you have a great product then I will do everything I can to help you get your message 'out there'.

Finally, Some things to Wonder and Share About:

Every post in Ways To Wonder has a little section like this - please share your thoughts in response to the questions or the post. :)

What is Your Dream?

1. What is your dream? (and is it big enough for you?)
2. What frustrates, annoys or irritates you (and how might these actually be signposts to what you could or should be delivering in the world?)
3. What do you need to give space to, let go of or ease into in helping you build the contribution you want to make to yourself and others?

Hello to all my Business Wealth Club Guests and Members....

I am so happy to be bringing and building up a Community where business owners can come to learn great content, make some fantastic connections and really take some time out to learn tips and techniques to propel their profits, possibilities and power to whole new levels.

I'm excited to be creating a space where we can share ideas, learn from each other and get stuff DONE!!

See you at the next meeting?
Helena

a little lightness goes a long way...

Wholly relaxed in half a pose...

I was delighted when a link arrived this morning...Happy Easter to all who are celebrating it, and I'm sharing the joy by helping you have a little giggle and a great demonstration of just taking time out to wonder - whatever that looks like to others. I love the blatant relaxed look of this gorgeous kitty taking some time out to just chill, and more than that I love the last few seconds of the video as I imagine the kitty just exasperatedly raising a furry eyebrow in a 'what is so funny' look!

Enjoy!

Focus after chaos

It’s Monday. Time to breathe new life into a new week. Time to start to focus with clarity again. Time to reconnect to the heart. We’ve good reason to in my part of town today. There’s something clean about a Monday. Washing away the sins of the week that’s been, Monday seems to give permission for the week (and therefore us in it) to start again. To begin anew. This week, in Croydon, it feels important that we begin anew.

You see, I live in Croydon, London. It’s a place not renowned for its charms per se. It’s a functional lively place to live, and offers a huge diverse cultural pot of people that makes it interesting to walk down the street. It’s a down to earth, slightly grubby functional part of town, home to many different classes, races and ages. It’s home to us though, and most of us who live here say the words ‘I live in Croydon’ with a kind of grudging pride that has a hint of ‘come on then, say what you need to say’ in response. Croydon has a bit of a reputation, you see. It’s one of those places that elicits a ‘Oh…Croydon…’ response when you tell people where you live.

Most people in their minds eyes seem to imagine up grey buildings, 60s leftovers, grotty streets, short miniskirted club goers (even in winter), young (young!) mothers, ethnic diversity and all of that some how adds up to an apologetic ‘oh you live in Croydon…’ type of response. And whilst all of that might be a somewhat true reflection, we try to put our best face forward when you come to visit. There are some things we are not so proud of. But mostly, it’s a good place to live.

Last Monday though, something happened. In response to tensions, in search of release, in sheep like fashion…for whatever reason, chaos sparked. Buildings and tempers too. As a result, for the last week or so, we’ve been dusting ourselves and our streets off. Making good by boarding up buildings and learning to live with the smell of smoke in the air. Chaos reigned in our streets in the form of riots and looting.

And without quite realising it, I’m only now realising that I’ve been caught in internal chaos. I lost track of my heart, I went into shock. And as with most times when our bodies go into shock, I had not realised it. I went about my daily business, responded emotionally, but actually, my heart left my body and I was not quite able to function in the way I usually do.

That means I spoke to people affected – shopkeepers who dashed to Ikea to buy more lighting so their customers could see what they were buying because the normal daylight was hidden behind boarded up broken windows. I commiserated and shook my head in a ‘what’s to be done’ way. I called the council offering to bring my broom to wherever it was needed – apparently over 500 calls were made by 10am on Tuesday morning. All calls of help and support offered. I tried to breathe through it. I pretended I could just get on with life as if this was some small blip. I smiled in gratitude when fellow Croydon friend, knowing that I was in a particular part of town, called on Tuesday lunchtime telling me that it was apparently all kicking off again, with instructions to take the back streets home. I also did what I was told.

What I’ve realised this morning, as we come into a new week though is that my body has holding shock. My heart has been somewhere outside of me as I continued through the week. Deep sadness crept in and though I was going through the motions of ‘it’s ok, get on with life as usual’, life has NOT been usual this week.

I went to the shops and bought things – and noticed many people chatting and talking more than usual. I nodded hello and stopped to talk to my neighbours on the street every time I left the house for something (this is not entirely normal, not EVERY time I go out do I do that!). I enjoyed our friends coming round, I cooked, I went to the large hardware store to buy concrete and ballast for our new patio slabs that were being laid (I noticed that much of the large sheets of plywood were out of stock). We continued on. Life went on. And yet, I smelled acrid smoke in the air as bus doors opened and tried to make that ok, telling myself it was over. It was a moment of madness.

But behind and through it all, I realise I am still listening, just listening out for the helicopters, the sirens and silently sending little prayers of gratitude out for the safety of all concerned. Through the days, passing shops with wood for windows, signs out front saying ‘sorry we’re closed’ or ‘open for business’. I realise that I’ve been holding my breath. I’ve been in shock. I shut down my heart and have been going through the motions of living.I slapped an ‘I’m fine, I’m coping well’ label on me and went about my business. I lost connection with myself.

But the promise of ‘Monday’ and a chat with a wise woman has helped me notice the tensions in my body, my mind and my heart. With her help, I shook myself off this morning and have returned my heart to its rightful place, inside of me, able to open and close at will through my desire. Through tapping on my thymus, waking my heart back up and shaking out the shock, I’m finally coming back into light and focus. By being ok about feeling human and acknowledging that actually I was scared and sad and simply did not quite know what to do or think…through doing all of this, I am suddenly free and clear to start my week differently than I did last week. Because only with my heart wide open can I go and really have the conversations, really create and have the connection that my part of town so desperately needs right now.

I’m off to see what that means for me; I invite you to check in with yourself – really check in: how are you doing? is your heart open or closed? in response to what? and if it is closed just now, what can you do to open it up a little, even if just to yourself?

I recommend breathing (in for four, hold for four, out for four), bouncing (mini trampolines are wonderful), skipping – with or without a rope! – until you are out of breath, actually just saying out loud that it’s ok to feel the way you feel sometimes – and really say it: I’m scared that…, I’m sad that… and just notice what you might need underneath all that feeling. And if it’s at all possible, go fulfil that need as a gift to yourself. Whether that’s a hug, a yell, some reassurance from a friend, a breath, some clarity or even just a cup of tea. Go give it to yourself. Or even better, go give it or share it with someone else closeby. They may need it too.

New Life Appears Easily When We Look For It

Down the road from me there's a tiny park. About 4 years ago, the council decided that rows of daffodils would be just the thing...and every year since the tall green stems surprise me with their resilience and inate knowledge that it's time to surprise me! Just this week, yellow heads started to appear and I just love this time of year. I love it that I can again begin to track time by the way the greenery and colour around me is shifting. Don't get me wrong, I love the sparse nature of winter, the lack of foliage and the broody sulky teenager that it seems to personify. Still, thin and heavily into dark clothing, dramatic effect and stark nakedness.

But Spring! It just lifts my heart to walk around seeing buds appear, blossoms popping out, snow drops fading from sight. It's exciting and new, and just so beautiful. Like the spring all around me, I'm also coming out from my hibernation. I've been fairly quiet, enjoying moments of joy but keeping them all to myself or at least a select few only. Somehow it was needed. The restoration of winter, the hanging out with broody teens made me a little silent too, touching the deep and dark inside me.

And it feels so good. If you've ever had a little bit of a 'silent retreat' even with many people around you, you'll know the bliss of just turning in and listening to your heart. Slowing down enough to hear the deep flows of messages from the heart. That's been my promise to myself this year: Follow Your Heart.

Just that one decision has taught me so much. In the last two months, I have given up a job that was not serving me and that I had stopped serving people through; started writing the story that's been wanting to come out for about the last twenty years; been put in the path of several new fab people who are perfect travellers for this years new journey...My universe is working over time.

Simple mantras make life really easy. Have you made a promise to yourself this year? Have you set some words for your life that make it easy to create newness and joy in your world? If you have not, I'd recommend it. A really simply phrase I was reminded of recently has stuck with me and seems to be my soundtrack of the moment. And before you think I've let go of 'Follow Your Heart', I've not - this one just tied in so beautifully that it is acting as a complement to it.

This is my latest mantra which I'm using to think through any food or drink I'm about to delight in: 'Will it clog me or cleanse me?' (I take no credit for it, but believe it to be a Louise Hay quote).

Whatever you are hearing inside yourself, remember that words are important and that you can choose the ones that hold power for and over you. If you don't like what you are saying to yourself at the moment or have no guiding light for your days, here's my tip: get lost in a little silence, do a bit of brooding, be a bit of a skulky teen. Then when you are ready, emerge from it with words that inspire and nurture you in to being, doing and having so much more of what you want for yourself and those around you.

Much joy and wonder

Helena

Wonderstate Number 14: Enjoy the normal...

It's Saturday morning. It's early. Not much is happening in my house; one of the cats has seen me put down food for him. He sat and watched me, as is normal. Then left. As is normal. He will no doubt now play outside for a moment, sort out his morning ablutions, then pad upstairs and find the man in the bed (as is normal)and snuggle under the blanket, proceed to purr really loudly and contently. As is normal.

I am likely to discover the other cat nesteled ON something soft (as is normal). I've yet to find him. Being a dark tabby, he 'blends in' more than the long haired black and white.

The house is quiet. This is very normal and I love it. I like to just sit down on the chair and take a moment to breathe and be grateful. Just stop. Breathe. Really breathe, loudly enough so you can hear it. Then I smile. Then I get up and make home made cafe latte. As is normal.

Whilst the espresso filters out of the machine, I usually end up finishing the bottle of milk and rather than rinse it out, I fill it up, remants of milk still in it and go around the house watering my plants. This is one of those things I read somewhere, that the milk is useful to the plants. I have no idea why I started believing it, but I did and the plants seem happy enough. So it has become part of what's normal. Clinking around the house with my glass milk bottle, nourishing the green. (And yes, we have a milkman - Tom - who brings us our milk to the doorstop! This is another bit of normal that I love in my life).

I bring up one cup of it to the man in the bed, who is snugging with the cat. As is normal, I hear the cat before I even enter the room. I leave the frothy coffee on the side, slip into the bed, dragging attention away from the cat as the man gives me a big hug and holds me in grateful thanks for being me and bringing him coffee. It is normal for this to last only about 30 seconds before the cat realises that his source of love and snugs has been usurped. He comes to paw at both of our faces. We let him into the hugs and he starts to purr again. This is all very normal too. It makes me smile. I'm still smiling as I come downstairs to my computer, sipping my coffee, and enjoying the peace.

All this normality is reassuring, warming and delicious. It puts me in a state of wonder of the heart kind. I just open up my heart and fill it with appreciation of how much this simplicity and routine can make me feel like bursting with awe and peace.

Later on, I will do things that are not normal. That are unusual or varied. I will slip out of the routine and into the unknown. This means I might do laundry, or go to a course, or do some writing, or meet a friend. There is no script for the rest of the day. But all these things bring with them their own wonder. And as I sit there on a Saturday morning thinking through what might happen, I let myself get caught in the wonder of the head. What else, what other magic might today bring me?

As you are reading this, you may already have wandered off to noticing what's normal for you...what are the routines that make your heart warm, that reassure you and wrap you up in deliciousness. The tiny routines are a Way to Wonder, if you let them be. Get into noticing what yours are. And then do them with intention and appreciation for how they have come together and really experience how they make you feel. And if you discover that the routine does not quite fill you up, what might you do to put some reverence and joy into it? What thoughts might you apply to your 'normal' to make them even more special?

Yours with Wonder,

Helena


By the way, today, I found the 2nd cat on my coat, which had slipped off the hook in the night. He's such an on cat, but he does love a little variety with what is normal...